Confessions of a 22 year old

My life is really complicated.  Lots of thoughts and emotions flood my head everyday.  So here's a couple of my recent thoughts.

1.  Winter is the worst season.  In retrospect, wearing coats and scarves and hats all seems really exciting, but then the day comes where I have to bundle up before going out into the cold and I hate it.  It is NOT fun.  There is nothing exciting about it.  During the winter my daily goal is getting from one warm building to another warm building before I break into tears.  Literally I just have to grit my teeth and tell myself I'll survive.  Do you guys think I'm dramatic?  (PS. I know it's not winter yet, alright?)

2.  I contemplate chopping my hair off every single day.  I'm not kidding.  I want to cut my hair so badly but there is one thing stopping me, and I bet you can guess what it is.  Boys. Yup, you can say it.  I'm shallow.  But boys like long hair and I don't hate it when they run their fingers through it.  Okay is this getting TMI for you?  Sorry, I'll stop now.

3.  Speaking of hair, I REALLY love man buns.  I know half of you just barfed in your mouth, but I love them and think they are so attractive.  I have no shame.  But I'm not sure I'm edgy enough to go out with a guy that has a man bun.  I'm too much of a blonde mormon girl.  Bummer.

4.  Taylor Swift's new album is gold.  But everyone knows this.  I scream her lyrics everyday.  Gah, she just gets me (I know every other girl is saying this).  BUT IT'S TRUE.  "I must admit, just because you're clean doesn't mean you don't miss it."

5.  I just want friends.  Guys, I love people and I just wish you never had to say goodbye to friends or burn bridges or any of that bad stuff.  If you're my friend, please stay forever and never leave me, okay?  Okay but on the real, having friends is what makes life worth living and I LOVE ALL MY FRIENDS!

6.  Do people actually have their lives together or is everyone just acting like it?  Because seriously I act like I have my life together, but real talk, I don't.  I say I have all these plans for the future, but honestly things never go according to plan so i've stopped planning and I'm kinda just hoping for the best.  That's how life works, right?

7.  Sometimes running away sounds like a really good idea.  But then I think about how I literally have 4 credits left 'til I graduate from college and how much blood, sweat, and tears went into getting a college education and all of a sudden it sounds like the worst possible idea.

8.  I imagine that my 2014 is equivalent to Britney Spears 2007.  About to go shave my head guys.

JUST KIDDING ABOUT THAT ONE ^^.  My life is great and I am so blessed.  I couldn't have asked for a better life.  I have been blessed with the greatest family and friends and so many opportunities that I would never take back!  I know I sometimes sound dramatic, but when it comes down to it, life is the funnest roller coaster I have ever been on!

XOXO,
Allie

10 Things That Happen When You're a 5th Year Senior

So I started my senior year of college.  And when I say senior year I actually mean my 5th year. You got it. I'm one of those people. To justify my position, I was a student athlete so I took a light load of classes the first couple of years of school.  But I also didn't know what I wanted to do with my life so I delayed declaring a major. These things have led me to take 5 years to graduate.  Most of the time it's normal, but sometimes these things happen:

1.  You can never again ask someone what year of school they are in.  Because what if they ask you the same question? What would I say? Oh, I'm a senior. Lies. Oh, this is my last year. What does that even mean? So most of the time in my classes I try to stray away from the generic small talk and talk about anything other than school.  Which can be really hard because it's the only thing I have in common with most of these people. 

2.  I can no longer tell people I am/was on the swim team. If I said I am on the swim team I would be lying, and if I said I was on the swim team they would ask me why I am not anymore.  And I certainly can't admit to them that this is actually my 5th year and I am retired and what not. But I'm not going to let people just assume that I quit or got kicked off. I didn't suffer through 4 years to let people think that I quit. Hellz no. 

3.  You can't flirt with every guy on campus without a ring. Now that I am 22 there are actually boys younger than me. It's weird. I'm not about to date a 21 year old boy who graduated in 2011. They feel like babies compared to me. And they are.

4.  Hearing the words, "Incoming class of 2014" makes me want to puke.  I can't believe that I go to school with people that graduated in 2014. That feels so wrong. I saw a sign in the library yesterday that had a sign with all the signatures of the incoming class of 2014. Lyke, how are they in college? Then I realized that most people in that class will graduate in 2018, or if you are a boy who will serve a mission, you will graduate in 2020?!?! UM WHAT? I feel like I am going to be dead by the time 2020 rolls around. 

5.  You see your peers graduate and you wonder why they got there but you can't seem to. I'm convinced Instagram is of the devil. It just shows me all the things that I definitely DON'T have, not excluding a diploma. You start to wonder if there is something wrong with you. Where did I go wrong in my life that college had to take me 5 years?! Okay, I'm being dramatic. But graduation was a hard time for me.

6.  People start to assume you graduated. Most people that I come into contact with think that I have graduated from college. Ha, funny story. Most of the time I have to explain to them that I have another year of school, and blah blah blah. Sometimes it's a painful process.  

7.  You think more about finances. It may not be true for everyone, but it is for me. I am constantly worrying about how I am spending my money. Because after this year, guess what? I'm not going to have a cheap BYU Insurance Plan that is paying all of my medical bills, and I'm not going to want to live in Provo where student housing is dirt cheap, and maybe I'm going to want to get a real wardrobe so I can get a real job (or maybe not).

8.  You wonder how many other people are in your same situation.  I try to look around and spot people who look like this is their 5th year of school. Not that we look different (hope not).  But I just find comfort in knowing that there are people out there that are just like me. 

9.  You get people asking you if you stuck around to find a husband. Guys, this is the worst possible thing. Please never ask me this. I'm begging. The answer is no. I wish I was graduated and out of Provo. I've been here for too long. The dating is good in Provo; lots of eligible bachelors, but that's no reason for me to hang around for another year. SO, hard pass on that one.

10.  You realize that after all the complaints you have about being a 5th year, it's actually the best decision you have ever made. Yup, ya heard. Being a 5th year is great because guess what?! I have another year to free load off of BYU and find time to figure out what I actually want to do with my life! College is supposed to be the best time of your life, and the fact that I get another year of it is awesome! So here's to my victory lap of college. #yolo  

"When I Met You in the Summer"

Summer is coming to an end, what?! How is this happening. IDK, but it is. Let's just talk about my summer lyfe for a bit, shall we?

This summer was the best of my entire life. No doubt. No question about it. I didn't have swimming in my life so I basically got to do whatever the heck I wanted.  Stay up 'til 4 am? No problem. Go out of town for the weekend? I'm down. I've never had that kind of freedom in my life before and I never want to give it up.

I tried to spend a lot of time outside and explore Utah. I'll admit that before this summer I disliked Utah a whole lot. I almost hated it. The winters make me so angry and I hate my life for about 6 months of the year. Well, today I can say that I really LOVE Utah! Seriously guys, it has so much to offer. The weather is beautiful, the mountains have so many beautiful hikes, there are tons of lakes all around the state, and the people here are pretty awesome too. I've been converted. #what

Maybe I am just saying all of these great things about Utah because summer puts me in a really great mood. Seriously. If you know me well you know that summer brings out the best in me. I actually get out and socialize with people when the weather is warm. Fall is another story, but I'm working on it.

This summer I really worked on myself. Not in a "I'm only going to think about myself and ignore everyone else" kind of way.  But in the way that I became my best self. I developed a stronger relationship with my Savior (I'm a mormon), and through him I developed stronger relationships with everyone around me! It was the best decision I have ever made. I have never been so happy and content with my life. I want everyone to have what I have! Go here if your heart so desires http://www.mormon.org/.

School starts in a couple of days, and you know what? I am ready. This is my last year of college and I can hardly believe it. Where has time gone? Sometimes I cry (like today) because time passed so quickly and I'm not a freshman anymore and I can't live young, wild, and free and get away with it (I need my sleep people). But that is OKAY because there are so many more opportunities headed my way. At least I hope so.

I'm not lying when I say that every single year someone asks me if I am a freshman on the first day of school. It's an ongoing problem. People always tell me that I should consider it a compliment and that I just look young, but I'M NOT 18 ANYMORE PEOPLE. Ever heard that song 22 by T Swift? Yeah, I'm feelin' pretty 22 because I am. K, I'm over it.

But on the real, what should I say when someone asks me what year I am in school? Lyke, 5th year? Senior? Super senior? Holla at ya girl I'm too old for college now. Sorry for the digression.

Just in case you wanted to know, this is my current jam. I listen to it all day every day and it makes me feel pretty good.

Also, here are some pictures from my radical summer. (Did I just say radical?)

Sorry for all the selfies. Forgive me? Thanks for reading. I love you.

XOXO,

ALLIE YO

Ramblings on a July night

• I felt really patriotic today.  Watching the soccer game today just made me love America 10x more (even after the tragic loss).  
• I need new music.  I either listen to lame songs on the radio, or songs from the 2000's that I don't enjoy anymore.  Help a girl out.  
• I'm turning into an insomniac.  I don't sleep much anymore and I'm sure it's bad for my health but I don't know what to do about it.  
• Okay, 4th of July is my second favorite holiday, next to Christmas.  I mean it's awesome guys.  I love fireworks, I love summer, I love America, and I love BBQ's.  All of my favorite things wrapped into one day.  
• Worrying sucks the life out of you.  I'm just done with worry. 
• I feel awkward and embarrassed when I go running.  I just feel like everyone is staring at me and I can't get over it.  Running is also really boring so if you want to run with me, holla at ya girl, because I totally need a training partner.  
• I was thinking about high school and I don't know how I survived.  I went to swim practice at 4:30 am 4 days a week (2 club, 2 high school), then I went to seminary, then school for 6 hours, then another 2 hour swim practice.  Thinking about going to school for 6 hours a day seems like torture now.  Does anyone else feel this way?  14 hours a week of school is plenty for me.  
• My grammar at 12 am is probably sub par.  
• Never eat pizza before working out.  I freakin' love pizza but I had a whole lot of regrets when I went for my jog this evening after eating a slice or two.  
• The fact that people can tag you in photos on Facebook is just really mean.  I would say I untag 50 percent of the pictures that I am tagged in.  The camera is not for me.  
• My goal is to not sit at home in the evenings for the rest of the summer.  Big goal for this self proclaimed introvert.  
• I used to be able to watch Netflix for hours on end, but these days I can't find a show that I really love.  Anyone have any suggestions?  It's summertime and I have a lot of time on my hands so I'm not really ashamed that I binge watch TV.  Judge. 
• I'm going to Vegas this weekend and I'm pretty excited about that.
• Not working makes life really unfulfilling.  I didn't have work on Monday or Tuesday and I felt a little lost!  Luckily I found things to fill my time with, but I love the sense of accomplishment you get after a long day of work.
• Being tan makes your life a whole lot better.  I am just so much happier during the summer.  That could be attributed to a lot of things, but I'm going to say it's because I'M TAN.    
• I'm starting to really like Utah and that scares me.  Okay, the winters are brutal, but the summers?  They are the best.  Everything at this time is so green and beautiful.  And the mountains?  SO PRETTY.  Gah, what has gotten into me?  Utah has gotten into me!  Live here for a couple of years and you will realize these things too!
• I want a pet dog or cat for that matter.  When can I have my own house so that I can just get a pet already? 
• Where has this summer gone?  I mean really, it is already July.  I can barely believe it.

Those are just some of the ramblings of my brain.  Enjoy.  Until next time.

XOXO,
Allie

22

It's official, I'm 22, so here are 22 thoughts, emotions, experiences, etc. I have had today and this past year.

1. Listening to the T. Swift song when you are actually 22 is so much more empowering. You can bet it was on repeat all day.
2. Birthdays are like kinda stressful. I mean I don't even have a lot of friends and I felt like I was answering phone calls and text messages all day. Don't get me wrong I love all my friends and will never take those sweet messages for granted but it's a lot of work. I feel bad for all you socialites out there who have SO MANY FRIENDS.
3. Today I really just wanted to pig out. I had a cookie for breakfast and it was awesome. Then later tonight I had planned on going to sushi but I just wanted some grub. So I went to Buffalo Wild Wings and ate my heart out. I felt so American eating wings and watching sports and I loved it. Wouldn't change a thing.
4. The gospel (The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Aka the Mormon church) is the greatest gift I could ever receive in my life. I can't express it in words, but I am so blessed!
5. I will never be Blair Waldorf. Nope. I realized this today. I will never host a huge black tie birthday party where people from all over the world attend and we eat fancy foods and drink fancy champagne. Like it's fine. I got over it.
6. I was literally single every day that I was 21. I think that's pretty cool. I broke up with someone on June 11th, the day before I turned 21 and here I am today single. Still loving life.
7. I'm only on number 7 and I already feel worn out. 22 is a lot. How have I lived that many years?
8. I thought it might be cool to make my day all about Taylor Swifts song 22, but I actually didn't want to dress up like a hipster and make fun of my exes. Pass.
9. My mom didn't even call me and I feel a little cheated. She text me several times throughout the day and she posted an Instagram but I didn't even get a phone call? Okay mom if you're reading this, I still love you and all but like call me please?
10. My little swimmers at work sang happy birthday to me today and it just melted my heart. Children are so cute and I love them.
11. I used it being my birthday as an excuse for most things today. " I can eat this cookie because it is my birthday" " I don't have to go to the gym because it is my birthday" "I can go shopping because it is my birthday." Can you say selfish? Holla
12. I'm glad all the numbers in my birthday are even. #ocdproblems
13. From here on out none of my birthdays will signify a new age and responsibility. 21 was it, but it's not like I can use my 21 year old privelages.
14. Just because it's your birthday doesn't mean the stars are going to align and the day will go just as you planned.
15. I thought that by age 22 I would be graduated and starting medical school. Hahahahaha jokes on me guys.
16. Even though I am 22 I still feel 16. Is that every going to change? When am I going to grow up?
17. I'm not gonna be cliche and say that this year is going to be the best year. Like it could be really bad guys. Wait do you think that is bad luck? I take it back. Lyke it's gonna be the best year evar!
18. Tell me it's not just me, but this past year I got the travel bug! I just want to see and experience the world. I feel like most 20 something girls get this bug and I totally have it. Someone take me to Europe!
19. I really came out of my shell this past year and I'm so happy about it. Life is so much better when you're out doing things!
20. Despite what the primary song says, I don't actually think I'm one year older and wiser too. Okay yes I'm a year older but I don't think I have made a whole lot of new neural connections.
21. I'll miss being 21. Farewell.
22. Do I have to stop shopping at Forever 21? Just wondering.



Xoxo,
Allie

Let me sum up

In case you don't keep up with my life via social medial here is what is happening in the life of Allie: 

*disclaimer* I don't even post on social media about my life so you're not missing out. 

I finally started working and I'm really happy about it. I spent so much time doing...well nothing, the past couple of weeks that I was more than ready to start being useful.  I help coach a swim team in American Fork and I really love it. I know it's so stereotypical of me, being a retired swimmer and all, but I just love being in the sun and coaching cute kids that make me laugh every freakin' day. I got super sunburned (don't tell my mom) but it's faded to a tan now so that is a major bonus. Like I don't even need money, just get me a tan and I am golden. Actually no. I take that back. I need money. Life is really expensive and I eat a lot of food. Okay, enough about that. Job. Good. Loving it. 

I bought a road bike. It is awesome. I love it. Utah is a really great place for riding bikes and I am so happy I am here for the summer. I just want to explore all of Utah on my bike. I'm still getting used to riding. I get really nervous riding near cars so for the first couple weeks I just rode in my neighborhood. Ha. Lame. But this past Saturday I rode it on the Provo River Trail all the way to Utah Lake. It is sooooo pretty out there. But I want friends to go with. So if you have a bike, join me. Loooooooove it. 

I have a pet fish. I bought a Betta Fish one day. Just on a whim. I have never had a pet in my life, so I bought a fish. And a fish counts as a pet. Don't argue that with me. Of course I would much rather have a dog or a cute kitty cat, but I settled with a fish. Her name is Alice. She has whimsical colors, and I think Alice and Allie sound cute together. We are practically best friends so I needed to give her a name that sounded nice with Allie.  

Still looking for a summer companion. Yes, just a summer companion. Not eternal. Hard pass on that one. The weather is just so perfect that I just want someone who will go do fun things with me all the time. I posted this on twitter, so if you follow me via twitter I'm sorry for the redundancy. But I'm seeking an attractive male who likes adventures, the outdoors, biking, pizza, and waffles. Oh and if he wants to hold my hand or like watch movies on the couch with me I wouldn't object. I just need him for the summer months really. Once fall comes I going back into hibernation and can survive on my own. So if you or somebody you know meets these qualifications then send 'em my way. I sound desperate. Dang it. I'm not like that. I just like having fun.

Guyzzzz life is good. Until next time. 

Xoxo, 

Gossi I mean Allie. 

Ps. Just finished gossip girl and I loved it. Addicted. K bye. 

Dat blogging life yo

Lyke hi guyz. The blog is freakin' back and I'm slightly embarrassed. It's almost too mormon for me, but I'm going with it. I haven't blogged in over two years so I may be a little rusty. So much has happened in the past two years I would not be able to recap it all but I figure a brief update on my life wouldn't hurt. So here is what I have been up to.

I FINISHED SWIMMING! WHAT? Yeah, I feel weird still. But it is true. I made it four years swimming at BYU. It was HARD. Like I still have nightmares hard. But well worth it let me tell ya! I wouldn't trade those four years for anything! Now that I am done I have all of this new found time on my hands. I get to sleep in and do whatever I want between the hours of 2pm and 4 pm instead of going to practice. I still sometimes get anxiety about not swimming. Like I probably can't make a 1:10 interval for 100 freestyles?! I'm worthless now! Not really, but I feel that way sometimes. Enough about swimming. It will always be a part of me, but it is over now. It was a good run.

I still haven't figured out my life. Yeah, nothing has changed as far as my future. Way back during freshman year when I would blog consistently I was always freakin' about my future and what I was going to do with my life, and 3 years later I am in the same boat. Some days I get really motivated and have it all figured out and other days I just wanna be a homemaker. That's a career right? I do have goals, though. I am majoring in Exercise Science and I had planned on applying to Med School next Spring but I am having second thoughts. I mean, it' s a huge commitment as far as time and money. Do I really want to commit to that? I don't know! That seems to be the question of my life! I have thought of going to PA school and I am on track to do that now but the process is a little different from Med School so I am behind. UGH. I just wish someone would tell me what to do! No, I don't really wish that. I take it back.

I met my best friend in college! This is old news but hasn't been documented. I call her "bridesmaid material", because that is what she is. I haven't had a friend this special since all my friends from high school. She is one of a kind and I have the best time with her. Lyke I lover her and she's my person and always will be. She and I are freakin' funny, at least we think we are. Never laughed so hard with someone within the first two minutes of meeting. The first night we hung out my cheeks hurt SO BAD. I don't believe that it takes more muscles to frown because I got a face workout from laughing and smiling so much. She was my roommate this past year in college and she made it the best year ever! So many good memories. Now she is getting married and I'm sad because I lost my roommate but I will never lose my person. Oh yeah, we have an obsession with Grey's Anatomy, specifically with Cristina Yang and Meredith Grey, so we call each other "my person." Watch the show.

I am happy! The last time I was blogging I was in a sad place. I'm just gonna lay it flat out and you might feel weird but it's my lyyyyfe and I'm willing to share. I parted ways with my best friend that was a guy and it killed me. I seriously couldn't go one day without feeling sad about our parting ways. I cried a lot, and I am not even emotional. I contemplated running away. I wanted to be anywhere but in Provo where he was. But over the past two years I healed and now I am happier than ever. I have so many things to be grateful for in my life and I never want to overlook those things again.

Golly gee this is a long post. Sorry about that. I am just so happy to be back in the blogging world. Life is good. Happy Sunday folks. Oh, and here are some photos from the past year with a few shameless selfies in the mix. Sorry.
 XOXO,
Allie